There is a lot of paperwork to be done for this whole domestic partnership ceremony thing. And it all has to be notarized. And paid for. Luckily, there is a notary 2 blocks from my work. AF and I are going there on Tuesday during my lunch hour to sign our City and State domestic partnership forms and have the nice lady sign off on them so we can mail them in and get officially registered as Domestic Partners. This means she gets to be on my benefits now and is also contractually obligated to love me forever. Okay, the second part isn't true, but it's just fun to say. Planning all this stuff is actually a lot of fun. It's a really amazing feeling to do all this prep and planning for our future.
Basically how this whole thing got started is sort of old-fashioned. Both of us really, REALLY want to have a baby (or 4: See previous posts). But I'm no fool and I told AF that I want to have a baby with her but I am not going to do that until we get married. We've been through a lot of rough things as a couple and it has strengthened our relationship, convincing me that we can stand the test of time, but there is something about having a ceremony and signing forms and getting certificates that really makes it all special. After this is all over, it's baby time. I was talking to my big sister on the phone yesterday and she was saying that it feels weird to have one sister getting married and one having a baby (Lil Sis is preggers). I told her we all do things in our own time and she'll get there if it's meant to happen.
I also asked her for the one thing I am going to need help with in all of the wedding planning. On the day of the event, I am going to need someone to answer the door, tell people where to drop their things off and where to go for the party. The way our house is structured, people have to enter on the top floor, go down 8 steps to the garage level, then 12 more steps to the outside area. She started complaining that she didn't want to be my "servant" while she was here visiting and I was being unfair! This is the only thing I have asked of anyone since the planning began (except for my Mom to help me make the invitations), so I don't think it's asking too much for her to help direct for one hour. Besides, I told her, our Mom is going to make her help me anyway, so she may as well stop whining now. Her response? "Good point. I'll help you." Success!! Woo hoo and yay!
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Many, Many Good and New Things!
So, I know it's been a long time since my last blog, but I have actually been really busy. There is a lot to talk about. Item 1, White Girl (my cat) has a weird skin thing where she has lots of tiny, gross scabs all over her skin and you can feel them when you pet her. It is really quite sad, so I am taking her to the vet June 6th. I know it seems like a long way to wait, but I am piggybacking it to a day when I will have a car because AF and I are going to the Indigo Girls concert and we are renting a car because it's in Saratoga at the Mountain Winery. Awesome venue and I don't think my baby wants to ride the bus, so she has to wait until I have a car to take her to the doctor. Other than that, the cats are okay.
Item 2: AG has officially become AF (Amazing Fiancee), as we have set two dates for our wedding. Day 1 is June 22nd. That day we will be going to City Hall for our paperwork so we can officially become domestic partners (YAY! Recognition of our life as a couple!!) Day 2 is September 8th, the day we will have our big giant Lesbian Luau Wedding Party in which my parents, sisters, friends, and many, many co-workers will join us at our house to help us celebrate our commitment to each other and have cake.
Item 3: The MOST FUN THING TO DO IN THE WORLD: Register for wedding presents. AF and I have decided (OK, I have decided) that I will be planning the entire thing myself, that includes registering for presents and making the invitations. However, the first thing you have to do when planning something like this is to register for gifts because you are then given little tags telling the guests where you are registered. Step two is a guest list and step three is making the invitations. Since I have the entire thing planned in my head, I have also decided that the only place I can make the invitations is Archiver's Scrapbooking store in Colorado. There is nothing like that here in SF, so I have to wait until my next CO trip to make them. I will be enlisting the help of my mother and whomever else we can to help. We have to make a total of 70 invitations. I am really excited about this whole thing.
At first, we weren't going to do anything. Now, we are having a Luau and registering for things. The more planning that goes on, the more excited we get. And trust me, I am not the "BRIDE" type. But now I'm wondering why I didn't tell more people about this earlier. I am getting a lot of positive response from everybody, and they are all really happy and excited for me. It's really cool! More to come....
Item 2: AG has officially become AF (Amazing Fiancee), as we have set two dates for our wedding. Day 1 is June 22nd. That day we will be going to City Hall for our paperwork so we can officially become domestic partners (YAY! Recognition of our life as a couple!!) Day 2 is September 8th, the day we will have our big giant Lesbian Luau Wedding Party in which my parents, sisters, friends, and many, many co-workers will join us at our house to help us celebrate our commitment to each other and have cake.
Item 3: The MOST FUN THING TO DO IN THE WORLD: Register for wedding presents. AF and I have decided (OK, I have decided) that I will be planning the entire thing myself, that includes registering for presents and making the invitations. However, the first thing you have to do when planning something like this is to register for gifts because you are then given little tags telling the guests where you are registered. Step two is a guest list and step three is making the invitations. Since I have the entire thing planned in my head, I have also decided that the only place I can make the invitations is Archiver's Scrapbooking store in Colorado. There is nothing like that here in SF, so I have to wait until my next CO trip to make them. I will be enlisting the help of my mother and whomever else we can to help. We have to make a total of 70 invitations. I am really excited about this whole thing.
At first, we weren't going to do anything. Now, we are having a Luau and registering for things. The more planning that goes on, the more excited we get. And trust me, I am not the "BRIDE" type. But now I'm wondering why I didn't tell more people about this earlier. I am getting a lot of positive response from everybody, and they are all really happy and excited for me. It's really cool! More to come....
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
On Little Mers...
And by Little Mers, I mean children. AG and I want 4. Obviously, for us, it's going to take a little magic juice from the Sperm Doctor. She can't just get me pregnant. Not like you heteros. It's so easy for you. A few too many Mai Tais and some Barry White tunes and BAM! It's baby time. Luckily, thanks to the magic and glory that is the Internet, and the liberal gay-friendliness that is the Bay Area, there are many, many options for lesbians who want children (like us).
Despite all of these things and modern technology, I am still an old-fashioned gal. I told AG (soon to be AP= Amazing Partner) that I will not even consider taking steps to have our babies until we get legally partnered. I'm talking Domestic Partnership papers and ring-exchange here. Neither of us are the circus wedding, big fluffy white gown, 500 guests and way too much money type people. It's just not us. We'd rather spend our money on fixing the car and saving up for sperm and fertility treatments. I know what you're thinking: Sperm is free. No it isn't. It's about $150-250 for the good stuff, but that's not all. There are many extras. You have to pay for the complete profile for the donor, you have to have a consultation with the doctor, you have to buy the insemination kit, book time to do it (either in-office, or at home), each procedure also costs money as does each vial of the good stuff. Ironic isn't it? The one time you NEED a man. Well, not all of him. Just a few of his strongest swimmers. You also have to pay for the sperm to be washed and for the samples to be prepared. A lot more goes into this than one would think.
Luckily, we are already preparing for this, financially and emotionally. It's just my way, I guess. I always try to get as much information and do as much preliminary prep work as possible before I take on anything major. That brings me to another point. For a long time, I was known as "the impetuous one." I am not really this way. I marinate on the major stuff for a long time, and as soon as the right time hits, I waste no time in making my plans come to fruition. I strike while the iron is hot, so although it APPEARS that I have put no thought into anything, the truth is, everything is already planned. I just don't take the time to share every little step and detail of my plan to everyone. Only the people it directly involves. I'm just making the planned things go as quickly as possible. I am really excited about this year. It's going to be interesting and fun.
Despite all of these things and modern technology, I am still an old-fashioned gal. I told AG (soon to be AP= Amazing Partner) that I will not even consider taking steps to have our babies until we get legally partnered. I'm talking Domestic Partnership papers and ring-exchange here. Neither of us are the circus wedding, big fluffy white gown, 500 guests and way too much money type people. It's just not us. We'd rather spend our money on fixing the car and saving up for sperm and fertility treatments. I know what you're thinking: Sperm is free. No it isn't. It's about $150-250 for the good stuff, but that's not all. There are many extras. You have to pay for the complete profile for the donor, you have to have a consultation with the doctor, you have to buy the insemination kit, book time to do it (either in-office, or at home), each procedure also costs money as does each vial of the good stuff. Ironic isn't it? The one time you NEED a man. Well, not all of him. Just a few of his strongest swimmers. You also have to pay for the sperm to be washed and for the samples to be prepared. A lot more goes into this than one would think.
Luckily, we are already preparing for this, financially and emotionally. It's just my way, I guess. I always try to get as much information and do as much preliminary prep work as possible before I take on anything major. That brings me to another point. For a long time, I was known as "the impetuous one." I am not really this way. I marinate on the major stuff for a long time, and as soon as the right time hits, I waste no time in making my plans come to fruition. I strike while the iron is hot, so although it APPEARS that I have put no thought into anything, the truth is, everything is already planned. I just don't take the time to share every little step and detail of my plan to everyone. Only the people it directly involves. I'm just making the planned things go as quickly as possible. I am really excited about this year. It's going to be interesting and fun.
My Mommy!!
I received much buzz and commentary after my last blog posting, and ended up with a result I am happy with. Mommy has agreed to come and visit me soon, but we don't know when yet. I don't ever include my Daddy in my pleas for SF visitors because he has said he will never visit me here because he hates the city, so I don't try. It's not as if I don't want him, he jsut won't come.
So, the next question, what to do when Mommy comes to visit? The last time she came, it was with my sisters, 2 months after I moved to the city and it was only for 2 1/2 days. Much has changed since then. Depending on when she visits, there are many things that have to be planned. There are tons of cool museums, including the Asian Art Museum, SF MOMA, Railway Museum and many, many others. There's the beach, the GG Bridge, many restaurants and parks, and street fairs.
But it all depends on WHEN. Different things happen in different months, and no two seasons are alike, weather wise or event wise. For example, if she comes in June, does that mean she is going to want to come to Gay Pride? If so, Pride begins on Friday, June 22nd. Also, that is when AG and I are having our little ceremony and signing our Domestic Partnership papers, and exchanging rings. She has already said she can't come in July because there's too much happening during that time. August is good too, I beleive the Castro Street Fair will be happening, and it is also AG's birthday on the 17th. However, Little Sis is having her baby Aug. 25th. That brings us to September, when Big Sis is visiting. Are they going to coordinate?
In any event, I am super-excited about this. More to come as details surface!!
So, the next question, what to do when Mommy comes to visit? The last time she came, it was with my sisters, 2 months after I moved to the city and it was only for 2 1/2 days. Much has changed since then. Depending on when she visits, there are many things that have to be planned. There are tons of cool museums, including the Asian Art Museum, SF MOMA, Railway Museum and many, many others. There's the beach, the GG Bridge, many restaurants and parks, and street fairs.
But it all depends on WHEN. Different things happen in different months, and no two seasons are alike, weather wise or event wise. For example, if she comes in June, does that mean she is going to want to come to Gay Pride? If so, Pride begins on Friday, June 22nd. Also, that is when AG and I are having our little ceremony and signing our Domestic Partnership papers, and exchanging rings. She has already said she can't come in July because there's too much happening during that time. August is good too, I beleive the Castro Street Fair will be happening, and it is also AG's birthday on the 17th. However, Little Sis is having her baby Aug. 25th. That brings us to September, when Big Sis is visiting. Are they going to coordinate?
In any event, I am super-excited about this. More to come as details surface!!
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